Creating space: Mental health is not an aesthetic, it is a state of mind

I once overheard a conversation at a coffee shop. Someone had just said, “let me meditate the answer”, to what the other quickly responded, “that’s not what meditation is like. You don’t meditate to think, you meditate to not think”. I remember feeling the weight of wisdom in that sentence. And it is true, the reference to meditation is quietly overreferenced and deeply under-comprehended. And this is true to the overall mediated-by-design mental health industry. Taking care of the mind is not really something that supposed to add more load to the work but rather take away the one working as noise. Mental health is not an aesthetic; it is a state of mind. It doesn’t look like journaling, like matcha and yoga. Actually, it doesn't look like anything at all, because it is not supposed to look like, it is supposed to be felt like.

I think about my personal journey. I started meditating 5 years ago, the first time I got free access to an orange meditation app subscription. I must say it was illuminating, listening to guided sessions starting at 5 min and then 10 and then 20 and so on and so forth. I had challenges by time and selected pieces for my morning coffee appreciation and daily gratitude. But my perception of meditation changed when, a few years after, I ended up taking a formal meditation course. By then I was used to using the app daily and figured this would only add an air of authority to my mindfulness vibe. To my surprise, theory aside, the course didn’t involve any words at all. No manifestations, not positive affirmations, no gratitude. Nothing. Pure silence. My first challenge was to stare to an object, eyes open, no sound; from the outside or from within. It drove me crazy, but I stayed with the discomfort and little by little, increased time and reduced input (meaning I closed my eyes to sit with the darkness). Eventually, I developed a sense of confidence and self-stem and when I felt enlightened, I told my teacher about how positive my meditations had become, suppressing almost all negative feeling. And I remember very well how with the same wisdom as the old conversation I once overheard at the coffee shop: Sofia, you’re not supposed to manage the quality of your thoughts, you are supposed to let go of all of them equally. And my teacher was right. To meditate is to empty the mind and with that, to create space.

Going back to mental health, my biggest discovery has been the importance of reclaiming the possibility of just existing. To take away the scaffolding of thought that burns intensively and in return, have nothing. Have you seen the meme of how adults saying that they now understand why their SIMS used to stop to cry out of nowhere and for no reason? Well, that’s exactly how we look when our mind is saturated. We must give more space for new ideas; slower, quieter, and more genuine ideas to emerge. Not for the sake of productivity of course, but for the sake of the here and the now. Start with something small, knowing that is better to meditate 5 min every day, than to meditate for one hour sporadically. Call it: compassionate consistency. Actually, let me go for my meditation.

…

I’m back. And I humbly suggest that you go and do the same. I know that you are holding a lot, that you have plenty in your plate and that mental health can seem as just another modern burden in the life. Another practice. Just another practice that only raises the bar for what it means to be an upright, capable, and sufficient person. But I invite you to take care of you not for the sake of more, but for the sake of less. Do nothing. Breath in, breath out. Drink water. And make space.

If you need a quiet space to pray, decompress or catch your breath, you can find quiet spaces on site at UAL.

If you are feeling overwhelmed, you can sign up for a 20 minute wellbeing session where you can talk to a mental health professional.

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